What Being a Married Woman in Nigeria Has Taught Me

"How can you talk to a married woman like that?"

If there is one thing I love about Nigerian singer, Simi, it’s how honest and outspoken she is. Through her music and through social media, she regular gives us insight into her thoughts on life and how navigating it affects her.

One thing she talked about before getting married was the struggles of being a single woman in Nigeria especially when she went house hunting, and now that she’s married, Simi still has a couple of thoughts about being married today. Are you ready to hear some of her thoughts? Then let’s go!

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Before getting married, Simi talked about the struggles of being a single woman in Lagos, especially when she went house-hunting. In a Snapchat video I’ll link below, she explained her struggle saying:

I’ve been trying to find a house now for weeks, maybe even months now and do you know how hard it is to find a house? And you know the bit that makes me sad is that it’s not that I haven’t found houses that I like cuz I have several times, but they won’t let me have the house. I have so many factors that are odds against me, let me explain to you:
First of all, I’m a single woman. It’s almost impossible for a single woman to get a house in Lagos because they think you’re a ho. Apparently I have faulted somehow by not being a married woman. Secondly, I’m an artiste also equals to I’m a ho. They assume that if you’re an artiste you’re definitely going to be wayward, you’re going to live a wayward lifestyle and make a mess of the house. One of these agents said to my face “you know your profession is lousy”. I have my money, I want to pay. I’m not begging for free house.
Next time I say it’s a man’s world, if anybody should mistakenly interrupt me, I’ll beat your ass.

Now that she’s married, she hasn’t forgotten about her struggles as a single woman, and she is still defending single women today. In fact, not long after getting married, Simi took to Twitter to say:

Hate when people defend women with "how can you talk to a married woman like that?" "You can't do that to her. Do you know she's married?"
I know u mean well, but you're implying that disrespecting single women is excusable. We gotta change that.
Marriage does not elevate the value of a woman. Every woman, regardless of status, must be treated respectfully. Some married women also need to erase this idea that they're more special. You're really not sis. Your special is in the good that you do and the value you add.